[ he can't make it stop on his own. even as he tries to close his eyes and squeeze at his chest, nothing helps. except—
he moves. he ghosts his chest and opens his eyes. the pain within jayce's most intimate precipice floods with relief, but it does not instantly cure the anxiety that has overridden him. he needs a bit more time, a bit more time as he clasps viktor's metalframed hand, bows his head, and prays for the terror to pass. breathe. he needs to breathe. he could have control, he had it.
he only speaks a few moments after, when the exhaustion settles in his bones and makes his inhales slower enough to handle. ]
You're alive, Vik— [ he doesn't care about the mess. well, he does. he feels like he should be the one apologizing to the depths for what he thought he had to do in that lab, alone. he only doesn't embrace the man again because he's on his back, but damn it if he had half the mind to! ]
I'm . . . the bigger mess.
[ if they're touching humor to deal with this, so be it; jayce slides his own in, despite his voice still coming in hoarse and wet. but jayce wins the mess competition. he literally hasn't bathed for months. ]
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he moves. he ghosts his chest and opens his eyes. the pain within jayce's most intimate precipice floods with relief, but it does not instantly cure the anxiety that has overridden him. he needs a bit more time, a bit more time as he clasps viktor's metalframed hand, bows his head, and prays for the terror to pass. breathe. he needs to breathe. he could have control, he had it.
he only speaks a few moments after, when the exhaustion settles in his bones and makes his inhales slower enough to handle. ]
You're alive, Vik— [ he doesn't care about the mess. well, he does. he feels like he should be the one apologizing to the depths for what he thought he had to do in that lab, alone. he only doesn't embrace the man again because he's on his back, but damn it if he had half the mind to! ]
I'm . . . the bigger mess.
[ if they're touching humor to deal with this, so be it; jayce slides his own in, despite his voice still coming in hoarse and wet. but jayce wins the mess competition. he literally hasn't bathed for months. ]